Thursday, August 16, 2007

Literary Life

I went to Rob the Bouncer's reading tonight at the Chelsea Barnes & Noble. I adore his blog, Clublife, so I wanted to go and support him as he makes his way into the literary world with his new book. He was completely adorable and sincere, and I wish him the best of luck in all his future writing endeavors.

But you know what the best/worst part of the evening was? Halfway through the reading/Q&A session, this douchebag that I've mentioned before on this blog (he also goes to my gym) sits down RIGHT NEXT TO ME, wearing the official jerk uniform of a blue shirt and flaming pink tie and crossing his left leg over his right in a manner that causes me to not only move all of my possessions one foot to the left, but also scrunch up in my seat as if I did not exist.

Then, the d-bag predictably asked two insanely dumb questions after missing the whole first half of Rob's presentation. The first had been asked already. (Of course.) For the second, he attempted to mock the "guidos" that Rob often speaks about by asking his question in a dumb-guido-like way: "Yo, so, what's the weirdest thing you ever did for money? Yo." Rob looked appropriately mystified. "Um, listen to that question?" he said. Perrrrrr-fect. That made me adore Rob even more. What made me hate the d-bag even more was his clarification of his question: "So, if I wanted to take a girl into the bathroom and have you look the other way, what would that cost?"


I am a New York woman. I've been propositioned, talked dirty to, insulted, harrassed. But this? This was vulgar. My eyes wide as saucers, I listened as Rob gave a somewhat intelligent answer to this horrid, horrid question.

The worst part? The d-bag recognizes me now. He actually nodded at me as he sat down. We've seen each other a total of three times (four, if you count when I saw him on the reality TV show). Out of allllllll the men in the city -- the hotties I can't muster the courage to talk to, the sweet-looking young boys on the train I occasionally make eyes at -- this is the guy the universe gives me to run into time and time again until he knows who I am? What did I do to deserve this?

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