Thursday, June 15, 2006

Who Wants to Play Old Maid? Anyone? No?

Against my better judgment, I called the Crush. Yep, just balls-out called him, repercussions be damned. And? Well, I shouldn't be surprised by this, but he's engaged to be married. The wedding is scheduled for September. He brought that up pretty darn quickly in our conversation, maybe in sentence three or four.

Crush: Yeah, I wanted to invite you to my wedding, but I couldn't get you to return any of my calls.
Me: (Hmm, the boy has a point. Was it my fault I found it odd that he suggested flying out from the Midwest to New York to see me after we hadn't spoken in years? He had no business in my life at that point. Okay, think fast.) Oh, yes, well, I changed my phone number.
Crush: Aaaaaahhhh.
Me: Yes. So.
Crush: Well, can I get your address? I'll send you an invitation.
Me: Great! That would be...great.

I hung up after a few more awkward bits of convo and stood, silent in my parents' living room. I wasn't necessarily sad that he was getting married; most of my high school friends/acquaintances are married, sometimes with kids. It's just that hearing him go on about his teacher fiancee, his quality-control job for vending machines, and the house he's building and really absorbing the excitement and security in his voice made me realize how important and in vogue it is out here to nail down a family life as soon as humanly possible.

I told my married best friend from high school yesterday, "I should stop being shocked that people my age are married and having children. At my age, it's perfectly acceptable."

And it is. For them. I just don't want that now. Or maybe for a long time. Or maybe ever. And in my mid-twenties, visiting the Midwest, that makes me an old maid.

So onto the more important question: Am I supposed to send these people a gift? What do you give the guy you crushed hard on your sophomore year of high school, the guy who borrowed your beloved Tori Amos Under the Pink album and tried hard to decipher its true meaning because he knew you loved her so much? The guy with whom the timing was never right? The guy you really wanted to go to senior prom with? The guy you kissed twice and then unceremoniously dumped and then had two phone conversations with and then dissed again and then called back to find out he's getting married?

Tiffany vase? Bed Bath & Beyond gift card? Applebee's gift certificate? Some indication of what he could have meant to you if it had all worked out better back then? So, BB&B it is, right?


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